What do millions of decisions lead to?

December 18th, 2007 by Abe Kass

Happiness is not the result of good fortune. It comes with the accumulation of millions of good decisions. Happiness is achieved in two ways:

1. How we interact with the world. The three most important things in life are family, money, and health. None of these three blessings come without effort. “Family” is built with harmonious relationships with others. “Money” comes from earning and conserving. A failure in either will lead to poverty. “Health” can be enhanced or ruined by how we treat our body.

2. How we interpret what happens to us. Things happen. This is life. Sometimes they are anticipated and sometimes they come as a total surprise. How you interpret what happens creates “your story.” Give “it” a positive spin, and it will feel good. The opposite is also true.

Excluding major tragedy, we make or break our happiness. Isn’t it fortunate that we have so much control over our lives?

From times of old until today; soul searchers, mystics, and the spiritual have sought perpetual happiness. Those that have succeeded have mastered the above. In my next edition of Moment of Wisdom, I will tell you a bit about how to do it.

Until then, be well and love those close to you. No one is perfect. But he or she needs your love, and so too, you need theirs.

Get started now. With my “Enter Happiness — discover how to create happy feelings” program you will see how happiness can be yours. To truly be happy, you must choose so.
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Wishing you and your family the best,
Abe

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What relationship disease can have devastating consequences?

December 12th, 2007 by Abe Kass

There’s an intersection on my way to work. One direction has right of way . . . till everybody stops “as if” there were a stop-sign! Why? Most people “assume” there is a stop-sign—but there isn’t one. Politely they `wait until the cars with the stop-sign take their turn and proceed. Confusion reigns as a result of this assumption” about a stop-sign.

Do you know how many relationships are messed-up because of “assumptions?” any assumptions lead to divorce. Children without two parents. Poverty. Depression. Anxiety. And even violence.

Example #1: Sharon and her husband Peter have just married. Sharon is lonely. Her husband Peter spends the evening on the computer. She calls him names and tells him she wants nothing to do with him. Peter thinks Sharon hates him, and stays away. Sharon becomes even lonelier.

Can you figure out the assumption?

Answer: Peter assumes his wife “hates” him. Actually she loves him and that why she is upset. She wants to spend time with him.

After many years of this relationship dynamic, image what the results might be? (Truly hating each other, divorced?)

———

Example #2: Seventeen-year-old Mike misses his dad. His parents divorced two years ago. Mike is angry at his mother whom he lives with. He blames her for his father leaving. He curses her and breaks things. Mike is also angry at his father for not giving him the attention he used to get in the past. Mikes parent’s discussed his anger and conclude he needs to be punished. Each takes a turn reading the “riot act.” They take away his bike, ground him, and stop giving him allowance. Mike says he hates them. Mike’s parents describe him as vengeful and out-of-control.

Can you figure out the assumption?

Answer: The parents assume Mike is out-of-control, rejecting and uncooperative. Actually, he loves his parents and family very much and he is devastated by its destruction. He wants more of his dad and he wants his mother to explain why she wanted a divorce. Sadly, no one talks to him so he has no way to constructively channel his fears, legitimate anger, and feelings of being abandoned.

If Mike’s normal feelings are not acknowledged, imagine in a few years where he may end up. (As a criminal, on drugs, running away from home, kicked-out of his house?)

Do you think you know what’s happening between you and another. Think again. Maybe it is based on a false “assumption.”

Don’t let the “assumption” disease ruin your life!By learning how to communicate effectively you can avoid assumptions. Surprisingly,but true — “listening” is not only harder than “talking”. . . but it is also much more important! I have a program to help you: Relationship Listening — attract the people you like and bring them close to you. Listen effectively and understand those around you.
http://wisdomscientific.com/proddetail.php?prod=620

Regards to you and your family,
Abe

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What’s the most powerful human character trait?

November 27th, 2007 by Abe Kass

I have been intimately involved in the lives of many people for about twenty-years. I have tried to help others with:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Out-of-control anger
• Relationship breakdown
• Self-destructive behavior
• and low self-esteem

It is obvious to me why must people suffer. I am including myself. When I am not happy, I know what I am doing to myself that is making me feel the way I do.

Many people find the means to turn around their misery and replace it with peace and happiness. But some don’t. Here’s why . . .

FREE WILL is the most powerful human character trait. I have learned to humble myself to this fact of life. If an individual is set on walking off a cliff—he or she can’t be stopped. Not by a family therapist, not by a police officer, not by a good samaritan, not by a loving family member. NOTHING CAN OVERPOWER FREE WILL. This is life. Accept it.

For me this is often a difficult “pill” to swallow—but I must. Otherwise I would be dragged down by the folly of others. We all must learn when to let go, and then do so.

“Walking off a cliff” could be:

• Substance abuse
• Infidelity
• Destructive sexual behaviors
• Raging at others
• Dishonesty
• Violent behavior
• Excessive self-love that blinds to the feelings of others
• and more

Even though I am a paid professional that has dedicated my life to assisting others upgrade theirs, we are all the same. Each of us has a responsibility to help those we know live a more happy and healthy life.

Make the effort. Let’s contribute to another’s wellbeing. If he or she is helped, celebrate. If not, so be it. You tried and did your best. Regardless of the outcome, you are a better person for your efforts. And this is important to remember!

Some people don’t feel capable of guiding others. Actually we all have what it takes to be a leader and give “good” to others. If you don’t feel your own strength, I have a lesson to help you: Strong Self-esteem — like yourself now and forever. Live with your personal-power.
http://wisdomscientific.com/proddetail.php?prod=622

Regards to you and your family,
Abe

Posted in Free Will, Self-esteem | Leave a Comment »